- Destructive criticism and verbal abuse:
shouting, mocking, accusing, name calling, verbally threatening.
- Pressure tactics:
sulking, threatening to withhold money, disconnect the telephone, take the car
away, commit suicide, take the children away, report you to welfare agencies
unless you comply with demands regarding bringing up the children, lying to
your friends and family about you, telling you that you have no choice in any
persistently putting you down in front of other people, not listening or
responding when you talk, interrupting your telephone calls, taking money from
your purse or pocket without asking, refusing to help with childcare or
- Breaking trust:
lying to you, withholding information from you, being unreasonably jealous,
having other relationships, breaking promises and shared agreements.
monitoring or blocking your telephone calls, telling you where you can and
cannot go, preventing you from seeing friends and relatives.
following you, checking up on you, opening your mail, repeatedly checking the
phone to see who has telephoned you, embarrassing you in public.
- Threats: making
angry gestures, using physical size to intimidate, shouting you down,
destroying your possessions, breaking things, punching walls, wielding a knife
or a gun.
- Sexual violence:
using force, threats or intimidation to make you perform sexual acts; having
sex with you when you don't want to have sex; any degrading treatment based on
your sexual orientation.
- Physical violence:
punching, slapping, hitting, biting, pinching, kicking, pulling hair out,
pushing, shoving, burning, strangling, raping.
- Denial: saying the
abuse doesn’t happen, saying you caused the abusive behaviour, being publicly
gentle and patient, crying and begging for forgiveness, saying it will never